Daily Drama: The Personal Adventures of the Benefactresses
Friday, July 26, 2013
Scrabook Time–Our sparkly, star-filled trip to RWA (fan girl squeeeeee):
The Diary of April O.
Thursday February 14 2013
So, Bessie and I go out and:
1) She takes the most epic giant poo in the road leading to school that requires walk-pooping in the pooping position. Yay for poo-poos finally!!
2) Then she runs from it faster than I’ve ever seen out of, I assume, poo-poo dispension joy…however, I feel as though we look like we’re fleeing from the scene of a crime where, perhaps, we pooped in someone’s car while they were driving it in some kind of poo-tastic carjacking.
3) We go to the bridge road, where JW showed me she liked to walk, and were chased by a gang of dogs. I am very sweaty. I also almost had to fight some dogs. They backed down when I turned back like “I will *@#% your $#%! up dog!” to the lead dog.
4) I’m not sure if she is at all tired. But she’s not scratching at the door.
Monday 4 February 2013
205lbs (I’m guessing as the scale and I are not on speaking terms right now), coffee units 3 (but two were actually convenience store coffees…does that count?), ice cream pints 1/2 a pint of vanilla, Yoga-Did not fall over or break spine.
Today, I successfully completed the day without any meltdown, work related or otherwise, that required respite in Haagen Daaz or Gu Jun Pyo. Wore a short skirt to work without revealing any secrets to anyone. Had dinner with my advisees and new dog. New dog refuses to go to the bathroom. Convinced I’ll wake up to landmines in the morning. Wonder if T is avoiding me…wish I could flip a page and read his thoughts…also that it was socially acceptable to use Glee songs to express marked life moments like coffee break joy.
New Year’s Resolutions
I WILL NOT
Eat more than one pint of ice cream a week.
Waste money on: blenders, ovens, mini-pie makers, or other devices that just collect dust in my kitchen; study guides for tests I never intend to take anyway.
Waste time on failblog and/or icanhascheezburger.
Fall for any of the following: tea or coffee servers, korean drama stars, japanese drama stars, korean pop stars, japanese pop stars, or any other unattainable figure of romantic iconic-ness.
Obsess about the future.
Drink more than one cup of Starbucks a week…okay a day.
Make better use of my time.
Do Yoga every day.
Be more confident.
Be more assertive.
Take the bull by the horns…or maybe the tail. It depends on the bull.
Stop buying chocolate chips by the pound.
Stop buying books before I read others.
Form a functional relationship with responsible adult.
Cook without butter.
Acknowledge that dairy is only one food group and one cannot live on milk, butter, and cheese alone.